Dear Agony Aunt Nicola
When I first a relationship with my boyfriend he was toned, slim and physically fit but now after a couple of years he’s become to put it bluntly fat. The problem I have is that I am beginning to find him unattractive which doesn’t help the situation with the physical part of the relationship. I still get on with him and we work well together but i’m worried it’s not going to be enough and that it could lead to a breakup. I do want to be with him but he needs to change his diet, stop being lazy, get motivated and lose weight or he will lose me. Kelly
Hi Kelly
Overtime couples can feel relaxed and comfortable in their relationships so much they don’t feel they need to go out of their way to make themselves appear attractive. It happens to women more often so perhaps you can relate or understand this? Another contributing factor to weight gain is also if people are feeling a bit low so look to food that gives them instant comfort for the short term. Find out the reason for his weight gain first, he could be so comfortable with your relationship he is unaware of his weight being an issue or ask him if he’s got any worries or needs some motivation in life. Tell him how much you care and that you value your relationship and want to make him happy which could give him the boost he needs. Also suggest doing some sports activities that you could enjoy together as well as help him get fit, probably the best solution! Get to the root cause and pin point what’s going, once you find out then work together as a couple which in turn the future will look promising.