Dear Agony Aunt Nicola
My girlfriend has recently been requesting that we use sex toys a little too much. I’m all for spicing things up and trying new stuff but I feel that she is enjoying using her dildo more than she enjoys my dick. At first I was surprised because she used to been quite hesitant to use them but now I’m lucky if I get sex once a week without using some form of aid. Is she trying to say I’m not satisfying her anymore? Any advice on how I can get her to want me and not the plastic kind? Jason
Sexual intimacy with your partner is important and there needs to be an understanding that you each know what the other enjoys. You have to be honest with her and let her know how you’re feeling. She might not realise that it’s causing you some frustration. Plan some days/nights when you get intimate without the dildo or other sex toys. Explain that you want to enjoy being intimate with her on your own.
If your regular sex positions aren’t doing it for her, which could be her reason for turning to a dildo, maybe try some new positions and experiment together. Sometimes it’s nice to please your partner but if it’s all one sided things aren’t going to work for you both.