Dear Nicola, I’ve been married for nearly a couple of years and feel my wife is slowly drifting away but into the hands of another woman.
She’s always been bubbly and very sociable with arranging group gatherings but lately i’ve noticed her being overly friendly with a close female friend. They hold hands when i’m around and when they say goodbye to eachother they share a lingering kiss where others have now noticed. This makes me feel very awkward and uncomfortable, I don’t know how to approach the subject and find out if there is anything going on behind my back. I don’t want to lose her but I can’t live a lie playing the ‘happy couple’. We are supposed to be making plans for the future i.e. have kids, a new home etc. What should I do, thanks James.
The best way to approach this is to sit down and talk to your wife. Tell her your concerns and how her obvious advances with her female friend is making you feel uncomfortable and others are noticing too. Maybe not ask her if she is a lesbian outright as this could potentially infuriate her or put her on the defence. She is your wife and unless you tell her how you feel this will be ongoing which could eventually make you feel worse. If she has something to tell you regarding her sexuality, if she is attracted to women also then she needs to let you know. You are her husband and she needs to take her vows to you seriously and respect your wishes.